Jesus' Son

I breezed through Denis Johnson's excellent Jesus' Son. I bought this book in college, but never read it, and it retrospect I have no idea why I was so hesistant. I can only chalk it up to being required reading for an absurdly early class the last semester of my senior year, thus not inclined to do much of anything. It is a complete 180 from Everything Is Illuminated and quite like a breath of beer-soaked fresh air.

Favorite quote: ....but we'd torn open our chests and shown our cowardly hearts, and you can never stay friends after something like that.

*I would just like to add that when hot-linking the title to amazon.com, I had to search for a cover that didn't make reference to the movie. I hate it when movie stars are on the covers of books that existed on their own steam prior to Hollywood. I don't want to read the movie version of a book, I want to read the book version of it, thanks.

The Nextel Yankees

Went to see the Yankees last week. They always have these little games for the crowd, up on the Jumbotron, when teams are changing positions. My favorite was the subway car race. Except instead of the D and F and the 6 racing each other it's the Dunkin' Donuts D and the Baskin Robbins F and the Coors Light 6. Really? Charging $6 for a soda, $5 for a hot dog and $8 a beer isn't making enough money? Do you really need to prostitute everything? How long before we hear "Diet Pepsi Matsui hits his third Nike ribbie and runs to Pizza Hut first base. It's a great day here in IBM Yankee Stadium--a great day, indeed, in all of Snapple New York City." Whores!

Everything Is Illuminated

I thought Everything is Illumintated would be better. Jonathan Safran Foer wrote a short article in Real Simple about having a dog when he's allergic to dogs (or something) and I thought it was an interesting, sweet article. So why not read his book? It had gotten such fantastic reviews (which should have been a caution to me: few things live up to their own hype). Foer's writing reminds me of Salman Rushdie's. Of course, Rushdie's got an excuse: he writes like Rushdie because he is Rushdie. I'm not sure what Foer's excuse is. I'm not saying the book is bad. It's not bad. It's good. It's mostly enjoyable. It's just not amazing. Which was kind of what I was led to believe.

Favorite quote: I know that it is not necessary that there be one right thing. There may be two right things. There may be no right things.

"You can't fight marketing. It's like hanging bubbles on a clothesline."--Shirley MacLaine

choo choo

Remember those hideous word problems from math class about one train leaving a station at 60 mph and another leaving an hour later at 75 mph? Or one train leaves in one direction and another leaves in a different and how far apart are they? Finally figured out how to do them. Awesome!

fun word alert

It's been awhile, hasn't it? I'm totally in love with the word "awesome" right now. I am also rather fond of "awesomest" as in "When Snowman buys me hot dogs, it is the awesomest."

Happy Anniversary!

Yesterday marked my seven years in New York City. And it's true, I've got an itch.

A Christmas miracle...in August!

Last week I met a friend for some drinks after work and as I'm walking home from the bar I realize I've dropped the airclick remote for my iPod. Even in my quasi-drunken state I'm totally devastated. I try to retrace my steps back to the bar, but I'm a little fuzzy on the details and I don't see it on any of the streets or sidewalks. I get home and wail to Snowman about what an idiot I am and woe is me, woe is me.

The next day I see it clipped to the side of a shopping bag I had with me the night before. I'm totally overjoyed and swear this is--finally!--proof of God. But then I start to suspect Snowman had just bought a new remote without telling me, which is a sweet gesture to be sure, but I was kind of hoping for the miracle. I could use some proof of God, after all. I just didn't see how it could go from being clipped onto my skirt to being clipped onto my bag. What are the chances?

But after examing the remote and noticing all the little scratches a new one wouldn't have, and after testing it with my base unit (which wouldn't work if it was, in fact, a new remote) I'm convinced it was indeed the hand of God.

Let us all rejoice!

Never ask a woman if she is pregnant unless you can actually see the baby coming out of her.--Matt Dillon

Rob Roy take 2

Remember how I thought I lost my copy of Rob Roy? Remember? Huh? Huh? I thought I left it at my parents' house and had my mom look for it and she couldn't find it, but really I just thought she was looking hard enough. But I open my suitcase last week and out tumbles...wait for it...Rob Roy! How did he get in there? Where was he hiding? Who knows. It's a blinking miracle! So, without further delay...

Favorite quote: ...do not bait your hook with too much humility; for ten to one, it will not catch a single compliment.

Riding for Two

Yesterday a woman on the subway offered me her seat. I told her I was getting off in another stop, but thank you. I coudn't understand why she offered me her seat; she didn't look more than five years old than me. Then I noticed the way my guazy dress with a high waist gathered around my stomach and how I didn't have great posture and how my arm was slung over my belly (I was holding a bottle of water in the crook of my arm). She thought I was pregnant! I wasn't offended in the least. I actually thought it was really delightful and funny.

It's a little weird because that morning when I put the dress on I thought, "You know, I could definitely still wear this if I ever get pregnant."

Use Your Illusion

How could I have been so absolutely horribly wrong? Back when I used to listen to Guns N' Roses--and I should say straight away, I only listened to them because everyone else did, not because I thought they rocked--I always thought the hottie was Duff. I mean, as a girl, I picked out the best looking dude in any band. I also picked football teams based on the hot QBs (another lapse in judgment: John Elway; as they say, there's no accounting for taste). Duff has since become a scary old man who still uses too much hair product, like all the other glam rockers of his time. I never for a second thought Izzy Stradlin was good looking. I never even looked at him long enough to consider it. But I'm doing some work today and I come smack up against his picture and he's so hot! Why didn't I ever see it before?

Robinson Crusoe

I have no idea why I ever wanted to read Robinson Crusoe, but there, I've done it. It's an interesting idea being stranded on an island, with nothing but cannibals for neighbors. This book was actually more religious than I would have guessed, but I suppose being on a deserted island will do that to a person.

Favorite quote: ...that mine was the middle state, or what might be called the upper station of low life, which he had found, by long experience, was the best state in the world—the most suited to human happiness, not exposed to the miseries and hardships, the labor and sufferings, of the mechanic part of mankind, and not embarrassed with the pride, luxury, ambition, and envy of the upper part of mankind.