Friday, January 13, 2006

Your Body Is a Wonderland...sort of

For the most part, the human body is rather remarkable. You can contract any variety of diseases—HIV, cancer, polio, malaria—and, if not recover, at least live in reasonable comfort for any number of years. You can lost your eyesight, hearing, ability to speak and still live on. You can lose the ability to move your legs or lose your legs entirely and even that won't kill you.

But you can't live without oxygen for even five minutes. You can live on a little oxygen for a long time, but you can't live on no oxygen for even a short time. I think this is our biggest design flaw. See, if I were designing, I would have some sort of spare oxygen chamber...in the appendix or our butt cheeks or something so that if we were ever deprived of oxygen we could...um...breathe through our butts, I guess. Okay, so it's not a great idea, but I'd rather be called "butt-breather" than "dead."

Design flaw #2: menstruation! Who's with me?

3 comments:

Mel and El said...

I kind of really like menstruation. I know... my girlfriends think I'm nuts... we'll have to discuss it sometime.

Anonymous said...

I love that I can have the power to reproduce, but yeah, the process could be fastly improved upon. Like if I'm going to have this big mess to deal with for 7 days out of every month, then I think for that week I should have super clear skin, or I should have super fast metabolism for that week or I should be able to fly or something. JEEZ!

Although I guess it'd be a big giveaway, "Look, up in the sky, it's a bird, it's a plane, it's... oh, it's just Shannon having her period."

;)

VE said...

I think your oxygen idea is a great one. In case we're in places where our lungs can't do their thing. Like - a coalmine, for example.