Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Junk (Food) In My Trunk #100-76


My (and I emphasize the "my") Top 100 Junk Foods

Maybe I stole this idea from Vinyl Edition and maybe I didn't. Who's to say who invented the list?

Junk food is a subject near and dear to my heart. Around 6 PM my desire for carbs is at its peak. There is nothing better than coming home, kicking off my shoes, and digging into a bag of potato chips.

Before I get into the list proper, here were my arbitrary guidelines:


  • Junk food means junk. No yogurt or granola bars.

  • Junk food only includes food marketed as junk food. No Pop Tarts.

  • Junk food must be processed.

  • Junk food does not include candy. Candy is its own list.

  • Junk food stands alone. Tostitos must be junky enough on their own, without queso dip.

  • Junk food must acquirable in a deli or grocery store. Therefore, no DQ Blizzards.



100. Tostitos. They'd score higher if I could include dips, but I don't think that's fair to the other junk.

99. Little Debbies Apple Flips. I can't say these taste like apple, but I like their chewiness.

98. Little Debbie Fudge Rounds. I can't say these taste like fudge, but I like their chewiness.

98. Smartfood White Cheddar Cheese Popcorn. This snack may have been my first indication that popcorn came in flavors other than buttered.

96. Keebler Fudge Stripe Cookies. Growing up, these were the ultimate treat.

95. Keebler Vienna Fingers. Growing up, these were a drag. Now, though, I think they're tasty.

94. Bugles. Raise your hand if you put these on your fingers.

93. Sun Chips (Original). I've been known to eat an entire bag of these in one sitting.

92. Little Debbies Pecan Spinwheels. I liked unraveling these and eating it like a stick of gum.

91. Cracker Jacks. Would have scored higher if their prizes didn't bite the big one now.

90. Sun Chips French Onion. French Onion trumps Original, but just barely.

89. Fritos BBQ. I don't love the BBQ flavor, but it's hard to ruin a Frito.

88. Little Debbie Chocolate Chip Snack Cakes. Chocolate cake and cream filling? Sign me up.

87. Creamsicle Orange Bars. Something about the taste of orange and cream is so delicious and comforting.

86. Lance Nipchee Crackers. I love the cheese. If you peel it off the cracker, it actually disintegrates into powder.

85. Girl Scout Thin Mints. Must freeze.

84. Honeymaid Graham Crackers (Chocolate). You can almost trick yourself into believing these are healthy.

83. Nabisco Ginger Snaps. I like ginger. And I like things that snap.

82. Nabsico Nilla Wafers. These taste like a slightly stale security blanket.

81. Rold Gold Classic Style Pretzel Thins. Hard to beat this classic incarnation.

80. Rold Gold Honey Wheat Braided Twists. Okay, not that hard. Salty sweet perfection.

79. Nabisco Chicken In a Biscuit Crackers. I just think it's fun to say.

78. Stacy's Pita Chips (Cinnamon Sugar). Just enough sugar to make it a treat.

77. Koala March Cookies. Known as Koala Yummies in my youth. Who doesn't like chocolate-filled marsupials?

76. Nabisco Mallomars. Like a s'mores minus the skeeters.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

OMG! Why when I'm on a diet?!?! So hungry and there are actually mallomars within my reach... MUST... RESIST!

Cool list though ;)

TinselTeeth said...

Fudge rounds were my favorite growing up and I can't seem to find them anywhere now. So sad...because that's something I could eat with my braces!

Anonymous said...

Do you really think cracker jack prizes have gone downhill, or is it just that hologram stickers and temporary tattoos aren't as enticing when you're in your late 20's?

MXF said...

Obviously you have not had Cracker Jacks in a long time. I would kill for a temporary tattoo or hologram sticker! Now you get baseball trivia or a picture of a sailboat. LAME!

Anonymous said...
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VE said...

I'm concerned about the Thin Mint placement. I feel these should be much much higher.

MXF said...

Thin Mints are not my favorite Girl Scout cookie. But next time you come over, I have some in the freezer.