What I think of the fifth burrough

Snowman and I were supposed to go on a "hike" in Staten Island, but we pitifully missed the ferry by three minutes, thus missed joining up with the hikers. We went over anyway, convinced we could explore on our own. The only problem? Nothing to explore. There was a brochure detailing a self-directed walking tour of "historic" St. George, which sounded charming enough, only by "historic" they really meant "old and run-down." We walked along Richmond Terrace, which I was led to believe would have a lovely view of the harbor, but instead had a giant green plastic fence, that I'm pretty sure kept the rabid dogs at bay. There was also a portion of the map that showed "shops and restuarants," which in actuality was a bodega and pizza parlor. The oddest part? There was nobody around. It felt like a scene out of 28 Days Later. Yes, Snug Harbor was sweet enough and the trees were brightly dressed in red and orange, but we had to walk two miles to see even that! The best part? I had packed a PB&J sandwich. That Branola bread is so delicious and chewy!

Out of 5 stars, I give Staten Island 1.5.